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For you, or for me?

Home educating. Is this crossing my mind once again because I’m selfish, I don’t want to put faith in anyone else to teach my child the correct way at his pace and the way I want. Or is it because as I explained in my last post ‘ School… Do I have to?’, I’m disenchanted by the education system on offer?

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I’m not sure. Knowing myself though I’m positive whatever decision I make will have the boys best interests at heart. The thought of homeschooling does appeal to me. It appeals, the thought that I can be sure my child is being prepared for the real world at his own pace. The adventures I’ve already planned in my head are exciting and I even feel there’s a lot I could learn along the way.

Trips to different places, meeting new people, learning to cook, I could even get him involved with paying bills etc… Maybe when he’s 6-ish and old enough to get a part time in house job… πŸ˜€ You can see what I mean though. Every adventure would be educational and the time we’d get together as a family too would be great.

Then I delve deeper into it. He gets older, he will still need to be prepared for real exams, maths, science and all the things I’ve long forgotten! I stop for a second and think, well if I didn’t need them and have forgotten them, how important are they and isn’t that my point about education needing much improvement and new direction. I’ve not felt this 50/50 about something since being asked whether I prefer Doritos Chilli Heatwave or Walkers Worcester Sauce crisps!

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I’ve made arguments for both options and presented them, to myself. I have obviously included the wife in this I don’t always discuss life changing decisions with the shower head. The argument to home educate is good and convincing. The argument for sending him to school is equally as good. I’ve spoken about personal family benefits and personalising an education for him to suit our preferences but, is this a disservice to him? Would I be missing out vital information by mistake, I’m no teacher. All the days out and adventures, surely I could and should be doing all that whether he’s at home or at school anyway! Our influence as parents too should override any others shouldn’t they? We can still teach him how to think for himself and give him confidence to question things.

Am I over thinking it? Can you over think decisions as big, I don’t think so. The whole grey area around home educating makes this even harder. As soon as I mention it to family members their reaction is exactly as mine was 5 years ago. ‘He’ll miss out on interaction with other kids’, ‘School provides vital character building’ all true. But after further investigation there’s a massive support network both locally and across the country. There’s activities daily for all home educated kids, more than you’d expect. I’ve spoken to several people who homeschool and they’ve all said they wouldn’t change it.

My reservations however are at the high school stage. Would I put him into high school to prepare for exams. At what level would he be at compared to the others? I hate that I even have to care what level he’d be at. The level made up by someone who was probably put through expensive private school anyway and hand fed their education to suit their requirements. Would starting school for the first time at high school level be a big ask, that age is difficult enough.

Then there’s the financial side of things. I could continue writing from home so that’s OK. Although as yet I don’t earn a wage from that. We have other business ideas we’re hoping to get off the ground over the next 12 months that would involve working from home too. Until then financially it could be tricky. But isn’t life always financially tricky.

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I’d love to hear from parents that have experienced the entire cycle. From nursery to GCSE’s. There’s tonnes of YouTube videos but nothing like having an actual conversation.

Let me know your thoughts… Anyone else in my boat?

20 thoughts on “For you, or for me?

  1. Something we have been considering. There are a lot of pros – not least staying out of the school yard politics that can also effect their education. That said I do wonder if they get the same exposure and therefore work on their social skills that a class environment gives. The other issue for me – but it is my own problem – is my frustration level. Let’s say I’m not cut out to be a teacher….to a point I’ve had to walk away . Which was no good for him or me and could have changed our relationship . So in essence no pearls of wisdom but will be interested to see which way you go.

    1. Interesting thought. I suppose there will be days both the boy and I become frustrated. Law of averages says we will have plenty of bad days between us. School yard politics can be a worry, we’d all like to think our kids will be tough enough to overcome that sort of thing but it isn’t always the case. My main worry would be him growing up feeling he’s missed out.

      1. You may be a much more patient teacher than me or learn to change tack when something is going wrong. Law of averages also say more good and alright days πŸ˜‰ I was also thinking about schoolyard politics between adults – seen this now in two schools. Absolutely agree it’s a worry – bumped into a mum who had taken her kids out of school and they seemed to be thriving. Said it was the best thing they had done. I guess it’s thinking through keeping up their social networks.

        1. Every negative point to home schooling I can argue how I’d overcome it. The only one being his social life. I’d love him to join football teams etc but you’re usually with school mates. Its soo bloody difficult ! Lol!

    1. I’ve managed to get myself in a Facebook group via a friend so its good to hear they’re useful. Everyone seems very nice already! How is your experience going? πŸ™‚

      1. So far so good, never a straight road but it’s our road! That’s for sure! We ae leaning towards unschooling for the most part. My biggest insights came from reading and Facebook groups! Good luck! It’s a wonderful freeing decision πŸ™‚

  2. There are a lot of myths about home education and it is always worth addressing those with people who actually do it. Generally, they are just that; myths.

    My best advice is to take some time to separate the words school and education. They are different as is the way you perform them.

    Good luck in making the decision.

    1. Great advice! Thank you for that. I realise I slipped into the ‘Homeschooling’ phrase but my mind is firmly in the ‘Home Education’ meaning. Slip of the …. Erm…. Suppose slip of the keyboard fingers πŸ˜€

      1. I think the idea you will miss vital information because you are not a teacher is the hard part to move past when thinking about H.E. Once you start and gain confidence the way you β€˜do’ education works differently. Then the hard part is trying to explain it to everyone else. πŸ˜€

  3. I know people who have done the whole cycle and gone into univercity having sat no exams, she got into uni as a mature student, got a 1st and a graduate job. This person was in the same year at uni as my brother and a year above my hubby. They were all part (my hubby and brother (he did a year placement) finish this year) of a leadership development program for selected students from the business school.
    I love that there is so much support on facebook etc i notice its quite a natural thing that comes up when we question our ability to be able to teach but nothing is ever going to be better than one on one.
    As for the social asspect in school they get to mix with people their own age great! When they are allowed to. Home education opens up a whole new level of socialising with different age groups just like when we leave school. Its the first thing people say to me and i dont understand where its come from that kids can only socialise if they go to school. If that was the case there would be no social life after school. Sorry long comment but really enjoying reading your blog πŸ™‚

    1. No problem at all be as long as you want! Love reading comments and hearing other peoples stories and thoughts! It is the big hoo ha that home-ed kids can’t socialise, I speak to a massive ZERO people I went to school with. I had friends and some of them are on my Facebook but actual interaction with anyone from school is nil. My 3 year old can hold down better conversations than some adults and he hasn’t started school yet! πŸ™‚ Thanks for your comments and for the proof that people can achieve what they want ignoring the ‘system’. πŸ™‚

      1. Exactly the same here for me and my husband, in fact not long after i left school i didnt bother with anyone from school, now i keep in contact with 3 friends from uni… i went to uni when i was your age, so those friends are about 10 years younger than me haha. πŸ™‚

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