No work today then?

No work today then?

When you’re sat in the barbers and the second question you get after they’ve put that awful gown over you that always rubs on your neck is ‘No work today then?’. The first question is obviously ‘So what you having then?’ whilst they strangle you with that gown thing!

See I don’t go for my hair cut if I can help it on a Saturday, to which I’d then only be greeted with the question, ‘You going out tonight then?’, why do they always say ‘then’ at the end or is this a Yorkshire thing maybe, sounds friendlier I don’t know. I usually try and get in early morning in the week when it’s really quiet and we don’t have to do that whole who’s turn is it first and one dick always jumps up when you know you had arrived before him. In the week, Monday-Friday though of course it’s only natural to assume I should be at work, I suppose. I’m taking it as a compliment because it would be an easier assumption looking at some of the scrotes you see in Doncaster that you don’t work so at least I must look employable. When asked the question ‘No work today then?’ I’ve tried several responses and studied the reactions. The definitive answer is just ‘No’, but they’ve only asked to make conversation and it’s an unwritten rule that you have to play along.

‘No, I’m a stay at home Dad’. Is the response I tend to go with now, I said this to a female hairdresser and I glared into the mirror looking for her reaction as I knew she wasn’t expecting that answer. Her eye-brows raised and a surprised expression followed. ‘Oh right’, was all I got in response before an awkward silence. Not a fan of the silence I then joked ‘Yeah, I send her to work’ to which she laughed, but one of those forced laughs when she was really thinking, what if the scissors slipped right near his ear. I’ve gotten used to this situation, think about it, a man that stays at home while the wife goes out to put food on the table, well that’s just wrong isn’t it? It’s not. Read this again and swap the genders around so the hairdresser is cutting a woman’s hair and she mentions she looks after the little one’s and sends the husband out to work. The response would be jovial, they’d laugh together, a genuine laugh as that is the norm isn’t it.

Another one is when family turn up for a visit. It always comes up in conversation what the dynamics are currently with who’s looking after who and who’s working where. I’ve tried lately, ‘I’m a blogger’. No-one get’s it. I then have to explain to faces filled with confusion that I’m hoping to write fantastic articles and send them to the internet in the hope that one day someone will think I have an ounce of writing talent and pay me to write about something else. I may as well say, ‘I’m currently building a space shuttle in the back garden and once I’ve filled it with Skittles I’m going to explore Jupiter’.

Friends are much the same, bare in mind my friends and I are still only 29 and thirty and we’re blokes, so when I tell them I’m hoping to become a writer and I’m currently blogging while the Mrs goes to work each day looking after adults with learning disabilities something I used to do that’s 100% a fulfilling amazing job, they say ‘So you’re pissing about on the internet between playing housewife?’

Channel 4 I think it is do those documentaries on changing perceptions. Has there been one on Men at Home, along those lines? I could Google it I suppose but I want your interaction πŸ˜€

Everytime I get asked the question about what I do I’m in an awkward place at the moment, they mean how do I make money to feed and cloth my children and my response in their terms is, absolutely nothing. I mean I know that I wake up every morning at 6am get a 3-year-old ready for the day, make 2 separate school drops, wash up, clean up, walk the dog, teach the boy something valuable like don’t put his hands in his wee and flick it up the walls before having to then travel again to 2 different schools to collect the kids, make tea for everyone followed by more washing up, AND somewhere in the middle of all this piss about on the internet!!!

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#changingperceptions



25 thoughts on “No work today then?”

  • I just don’t get why people react the way they do, are we seriously stuck in the Victorian era?! For my hubby and I, him working full time and me doing freelance working around raising the kids is the best option, but if I’d have had even a semblance of a career prior to having children and he’d have wanted to stay at home then that would have been fine! There definitely should be a TV show, although maybe not Channel 4 as they like to put their own spin on things!

    • There’s a definite grey area around people’s responses. It’s sometimes like men aren’t supposed to stay at home but if I said washing up and cooking was a woman’s job….. all hell would break loose!

  • Given how Channel 4 have portrayed people on benefits, I wouldn’t trust them to represent stay@home dads!

    I think I’d find a great deal of satisfaction in doing what you do. My Mrs sends me out to work, though. And when I get my hair cut, I pray for silence. I hate those conversations. Saying “I’m a househusband” is far more interesting than “I represent the Local Authority for legal hearings at the Courts & Tribunals”….

    • I don’t know your job sounds quite cool. I’ll have to Google it though ha! Yeah anything you watch on TV has that air of nonsense about it I, Channel 4 just sprung to mind first. I generally only watch Sky Sports! It’s fulfilling, it suits our family dynamics as they currently are and I’d like to think I’m trying to be sensible with my time at home. I could just watch Jeremy Kyle and Loose Women all day…(Sometimes I have a little watch)! Thanks for you comment πŸ™‚

  • Haha, you should check out my what is a yummy mummy post – I never want to say I’m a stay at home mum (recent happening) because people think you don’t do anything all day!

  • We are in a remarkably similar boat. Before becoming a stay at home dad/aspiring writer, I was in the heating and air conditioning field , which is a career that I would wish upon all of my enemies. Now if I could only make some money from all this pissing about on the net.

  • I know a few people who have done this. My best friend from Yorkshire was a stay at home dad for six years until someone was able to pick up his little one up from school. Not easy, but he did it. I am not a stay at home dad, but I have had to put my life on hold to look after my wife. At the age of 42, this is still not easy.

    Thanks for Sharing.

    John M (www.mrgeekandgadgets.com)

  • I was a stay at home mum which was alright whilst my kids were young. Now they are 19 and 14 I have to say I am a blogger and then look at them look at you either not knowing what that is completely or desperate for you to get them something for free as we obviously do no real work putting posts together!

    • Haha! I’ll be chuffed the first time someone sends me free stuff. I done think blogging is quite a thing in the UK compared to the likes of USA. Unless you’re involved and see there’s massive community πŸ™‚

  • I think whatever works for you and your family and only you know that, of course other peolple have opinions but i dont understand why they are ao shocked by it. I don’t understand where its come from that a stay at home parent does nothing either. Im exhausted haha πŸ™‚

      • Exactly! Ive been cleaning, washing, scrubbing, tidying all week, yet the bathroom is still a mess, theres toys everywhere and clothes. . I swear i blink and the laundry basket fills up its like magic! Now why the hell doesn’t it work the other way round! I think im missing a magic word Haha πŸ™‚

  • My husband would love to send me out to work and him stay at home with the kids. I think it is getting to be a more common situation than it was but the older generation still find it odd

  • Haha ending a question with “then” must be a Yorkshire thing!
    I’ve had this despite the fact I do work Monday to Friday – usually on my day off or if I’m working flexible hours to sort kids out. I cut my own hair so not in the barbers though. Anyway, I usually go for the full explanation but one time, in a shop I decided to go with “no, I wont the lottery last week and don’t need to work ever again”. Boy did I know about it when the gossip wagon caught hold of that one!

    • Ha ha! I’m using that one 🀣 That would be really funny in our little village. I wrote this a while back, now I just say I work from home. If pushed further I say I work in social media, a couple of times I’ve said blogger and many people still have no idea what that is πŸ˜‚

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