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Penis Talk

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Willy, Wodger, Todger, Winky, Chipolata, Widgy Wodger Woo. And of course Penis.

Pretty much all of these words are used in our house daily.

Obviously they all have the same meaning, penis. Unsurprisingly I thought up this post whilst having a wee! I just thought, ‘don’t we talk about willy’s a lot in this house’.

For those of you that are new readers of DadvWorld, we have a 5 year old boy, Corben. If you are new, what a post to introduce our lives to you with!

I think it all starts when us parents are trying to find a word for it doesn’t it. Previously Donetta had only dealt with girls and their flu flu’s or whatever they’re referred to in your house. I obviously hadn’t experienced bathing babies and nappy changing before so Corben and his todger was new for both of us. I don’t remember the first conversation around what the ‘society friendly’ version of penis was that we’d use. I’m going to imagine it was around the same time as Donetta asked whether you have it sticking up or sticking down when you put the nappy on. I think we googled it.

Google it, it’s pretty funny reading the parent forums around the subject.

It sounds like a stupid question but seriously, how would you know really? The majority of parents won’t have gone near a baby boy’s Chipolata until all of sudden it’s their daily life pointing up, down to the side and getting piss all over!

So around this time, before Corben knew what the hell was going on in the world, we will have decided on the term we were sticking with. To be honest, all of these were used when I was a kid so the ideas came naturally. The only thing that’s now evolved is that ‘Todger’ means a small one and ‘Wodger’ is for a bigger one. It makes sense if you say it out loud, go on, as you’re reading this say them out loud and you’ll see…

You say ‘Todger’ normally, then deepen your voice when saying ‘Wodger’. Corben and I came up with this whilst crossing swords one day. If you don’t know what crossing swords is then that’s OK if you’re a mum. If you’re a dad and you haven’t crossed swords with your son then I’d question your parenting.

Another one for you to google. Go with the ‘Urban dictionary’ version though.

So it starts early doors with us parents using the chosen term/s in and around the kids and it naturally catches on.

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That’s when the fun really starts. Once your little lad gets to the exploration age, probably 2+ maybe and they start to ask questions and repeat answers. The one term you had turns into 2, 3, 4 and more as you develop your penis talk with them.

When you’re chasing them around to get their pants on after the bath etc, you come up with ‘Let’s get that willy dodger woo away’ or ‘Come on get your winky in these pants’… It’s like farting, for boys mainly. I can’t explain the what, why or how, but it’s hilarious. As soon as you drop a penis term in any conversation, Corben laughs his head off. Naturally this makes me do it even more.

Just when you think all of the childish fun and games have reached a maximum and you’re out of terms and phrases, you drop the word PENIS.

Explaining to Corben that PENIS is in fact the correct word for what your winky willy todger is was amazing. He laughed so much his chipolata nearly fell off!

Now all of this is pretty funny and all light-hearted but there has been a method to our madness. We wanted to make this kind of topic an open topic within our home. Other than masses of laughing fits there’s also been loads of learning too. Making a topic that isn’t necessarily the ‘norm’ within conversations between children and parents open, it eliminates any awkwardness towards learning and sharing any issues around such topics.

Luckily there hasn’t been any serious issues etc but should there be in the future I feel our open talk policy within our home will mean questions can be asked and things discussed easily. Our lad is only 5 so right now it’s all about the laughs these words give us, but hopefully the methods behind our madness will be seen as pro-active for the future.

How much penis talk is there in your home?

Let us know what words you use in the comments and let’s have a laugh!

@dadvworld

 

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2 thoughts on “Penis Talk

  1. We’ve landed ourselves with “wadgie” and I’ve got no idea where that came from. On the flip-side, the young ladies refer to their parts as “flowers”, which is far nicer!

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